Difficult relatives can make your Christmas miserable. Family can give us the most fulfillment when we actually connect with them, However, they can also cause the most heartache because we love them and long for their approval. With the holidays coming, we all dread grumpy Uncle Bill or feisty Aunt Sally. Past hurts can also intensify the impact of uncomfortable encounters.
My father used to crack the same jokes every year and expect us to laugh. If I didn’t respond to his humor, he’d tease me about how my face looked, as if he thought I was holding in my response.
Mother would make a huge meal for Thanksgiving. I’d select certain foods, but not others, knowing I couldn’t eat it all. She would always point out what I missed, as if I overlooked that dish by accident. Plus she would attempt to get us all to eat more, even when we were full.
My grandmother would make snide comments with an innocent look on her face, and she’d do annoying things. she favored boys over girls and she’d always make sure we knew how much she spent on the boys. If we asked her to do anything, she’d do the exact opposite.
Well, you know how it goes. Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” Wow! That’s a hefty command.
Today I have two guests. The first is Angela Breidenbach. She’s a life coach and a terribly fun person. The second is Linda Rondeau. Both can give insight on this issue.
Have you ever been shunned? I’ve always been a little shy and studious. When I was in ninth grade, I took a Spanish class and found it challenging. A friend who was also learning Spanish and I wrote to each other in Spanish in order to learn faster. I was also taking a Home Ec class that year, and when we finished our sewing project, we could work on other things. Since I was free, I tackled my Spanish epistles home ec class.
I happened to sit near a group of girls who were very playful and silly. When they found out what I was doing, they found it quite funny. And they began to crack jokes and tease. I brushed them off at first. But as other girls watched, the number of participants grew and things got vicious. Pretty soon half the room was ridiculing me.
One day after class, I burst into tears and the teacher asked me why. I spilled out my story, and she was horrified.
But I will never forget the feeling of being laughed at. Being weird, odd
If you have a medical problem, people are compassionate, but if you have a mental illness, it’s a different story.
Ephesians 4:32 says we should be kind to each other, tenderhearted. I love that word. It means you ache for someone who hurts. You have compassion.
I have a friend who is bipolar, but she won’t tell anyone because she hears awful stories told of bipolar people. She doesn’t want the label. But these folk are ill, and they need us to be tenderhearted.
Today I have Leeann Jefferies who was a model for Eileen Ford, and author, Eva Marie Everson. Together they wrote Leeann’s story: The Bipolar Experience.
2:15 What is bipolar
3:40 Eva Marie, this is been part of your life too. Please share your story.
3:55 Describe cycling
6:00 Leeann, tell me how you feel
6:50 What does a high feel like?
10:15 What’s the answer for the manic phases?
[tweetthis]A bipolar person needs love and understanding[/tweetthis]
[tweetthis]Be part of the team for your bipolar friend[/tweetthis]
I can recall when I was a child in class. We were getting ready to study the human body, and I was so excited to learn what my internal organs did. I had some strange idea that my organs did wonderful things for the world. How disappointing to discover they merely kept me alive. Of course, in adolescence, the question of identity rose.Those questions are important to ask because it’s difficult to live without meaning.On the other hand, it’s very easy to build our self-worth around what we do.
When I finished school, I became a nurse, but I gave up that career to raise five children. That made me really sad, but I’ve been giving up my whole life in some ways. Later I found myself as a young mother who nursed her babies, but that didn’t last either. I grieved that role when I weaned my youngest child. Then I saw myself as a homeschool mother. That job lasted longer, but that distinction disappeared also. Each time my job description changed, I felt pain and had to adjust. I had to rethink life as a child of God. Someone Jesus loved and died for, but that transition can be tough.
Sometimes life really falls apart. How can we pull the shreds of life back together? How can we get through those times of disappointment when we wonder who we are?
Cynthia Rutchti is my guest. She has written Song of Silence. In this novel, the main character loses her gifting and finds herself afloat.
4:30 The main character, Lucy, was giving to others from her gift of music. How can we find that sweet spot so we can bless those around us?
6:30 Lucy was based on a real person who ministered through music.
8:40 Music contains rests, and Lucy taught her students to ‘play the rests.’ How can we do that by using those hard times in life?
10:10 What if we resist that reset time?
11:20 What does a healthy identity look like? How can Christians get there?
13:50 How can we achieve a healthy marriage in later years like Lucy and her husband?
16:25 Lucy’s family did things to comfort her she didn’t like. How can we avoid facing that in a crisis?
19:00 Lucy’s doctor sent her to a club. What was that great idea about?
I don’t know if you’ve ever had a time when you felt panicked, but I have. My youngest son is disabled. With numerous overlapping issues, he’s severe. I was homeschooling him, and I saw intelligence despite his barriers. A series of events led us to seek complete testing. The idea of testing bothered me because I worried how well he could perform with the number of problems he had. In time found a neuro-psychiatrist who came highly recommended. The doctor administered test over a few days.
At last came our final appointment. My husband and I would meet with the doctor for test results and a final diagnosis. That was the scariest day. The diagnosis he received would impact him for the rest of his life.I can recall my heart pounding and my chest tightening at the thought of driving to the office. I survived by praising God. All day I sought the Lord. I praised him for the air conditioning in the car, the blue sky, the car, the fluffy clouds, the dress I had on, my favorite color. Those prayers kept me calm enough to hear what the doctor had to say.
Think about the words Paul wrote in Philippians four: “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and thanksgiving make your request known to God and the peace that passes all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.” Those words are easy to say. Doing it can be much harder.
Today I have Maureen Pratt. She’s written a book called, Don’t Panic, which teaches how to prepare for a crisis.
Mother’s Day sounds like a day to celebrate, but many women don’t. Those who struggle with infertility or someone who just lost her mother or a child may long to ignore the festivities. I’ve even discovered some ladies plan activities, so they keep busy and forget. Maybe your child has strayed. Mother’s day hurts. If that describes you, my heart goes out to you.
As Mother’s Day approaches, I can’t help thinking about the importance of the job. The Apostle Paul spoke to Timothy, his son in the faith: “I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.” As caregivers and nurturers, we have a tremendous impact on our children. Our careful mothering can ensure a child’s emotional and spiritual health while poor mothering can damage both. Scripture exhorts us to teach our children with a balance of love and discipline. Our efforts will lay the foundation for the child’s security and confidence. As it says in Deuteronomy, “teach them (God’s precepts) diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”
On the other hand, I’m overwhelmed by the enormity of the job. Each child in your home possesses a complex personality with unique needs. That child expects you to understand him and know his motives. That’s impossible, especially if you have more than one child. Add to that the day to day work of living, meals, overseeing physical growth, and monitoring emotional maturity. As a child grows, you have lessons, ball games, recitals, finals. Life goes by faster and there’s more to do.
I came to motherhood armed to do it right. I’d studied psychology in school and determined to avoid the pitfalls. Whew! I poured myself into the task and gave it my all. Unfortunately, I made plenty of mistakes, and I learned how much I needed God. I’m too small, but my heavenly father gives wisdom when I cry out to him.
Jane Rubietta shares her heart with us. She has just completed Heartbeat of a Mother. Listen in for Mother’s Day encouragement.
In the OT, the tabernacle was the place where God dwelt with man. The Lord gave very specific instructions about the way his house was to be built and decorated. Later, the Israelites built the temple Solomon’s temple and then Herod’s temple.Today, however, the Bible teaches that our bodies are the temple of God. The place we meet is just a building. Notice the wording in I Corinthians:
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body. This addresses immorality, but most scholars have used this verse to say we should take care of our bodies since the Holy Spirit dwells in us.
Abusing out body isn’t appropriate either. Note the Apostle’s words in Colossians: “Do not handle, Do not taste, Do not touch” These have indeed an appearance of wisdom in promoting self-made religion and asceticism and severity to the body, but they are of no value in stopping the indulgence of the flesh.
On the other hand, we have Epaphroditus, who nearly died for the work of Christ, risking his life to complete what was lacking in your service to me. (Philippians 2) This verse confuses us because the Apostle Paul commends his friend for his commitment and service to the Lord. Does that mean we can overlook caring for ourselves in order to minister to someone? If that is true, many of us should and will ignore our physical health in order to serve God.
Practical Help:
So, what level of self-care is acceptable? Sue Badeau will guide us on this topic. She’s the mother of twenty-two children, and she knows about how to care for yourself. You may learn more about Sue here.
