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Worried About Perfection? Here’s Some Useful Advice

June 19, 2017

Worried about Perfection? Here’s Some Useful Advice

1 Peter 1:15 but 1alike the Holy One who called you, 2bbe holy yourselves also in all your behavior;

That’s a tough command. Nevertheless, that’s what God asks us to do. None of us are perfect, but I sure want to be.  I was the at the top of my classes in school, and I always hated the fact that I missed that one question on the test.

As an adult, I’m always trying to improve and grow as a person.

But, I’m out of school, and I don’t get grades anymore. Plus my kids are grown, I’m realizing more and more how that desire drives me. I also think about that passage in Phil 3 where Paul said he strives for the resurrection of the dead. He wanted to achieve the perfection he would have in his resurrected body.

This is a great goal, but how do we live with ourselves when we face our fallen nature? Where’s the boundary of Romans 8:1 “There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus?”

Striving to become as godly as we can while recognizing and forgiving ourselves for failing. That’s a huge job.

Today my guest is Doc Hensley, he is Professor of Communication (Professional Writing concentration) in the Communication Department at Taylor University in Upland, Indiana, and an annual judge for the Evangelical Press Association Awards and the Christy Fiction Awards. He has around five dozen books in print. One of his latest, Pseudonym, gets inside a woman’s mind and deals with several issues we face such as perfectionism and abuse.

1:55 What is the balance between trying to be holy and our desire for perfection?

3:05 How did you climb inside a woman’s mind?

6:08 The consequences of marrying an insecure man.

8:18 Do we women want the applause of others?

Learn more about Doc here.

Doc Hensley

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bible, Church, Commitment to Christ, Communication, Emotions, Encouragement, Family, Forgiveness, Freedom, Guilt, Heart of the Matter, Hope, Love, Making choices, Parenting, People Pleaser, Sex, Surrender to Christ, Venereal Disease, Walking by Faith

Bob Fife’s Experience: Gaining Freedom

March 17, 2017
Gaining Freedom

Bob Fife Shares his Experience Gaining Freedom

I don’t know if you have an itch to be perfect, but I do. I was a straight a student in school, and I worked so hard not to make any mistakes.  That tendency to long for good grades has snuck into my everyday life. I cannot bear to err.  And I know I fail all the time. The older I get, the more I am aware of the wickedness that resides in me. I wish it was not there.

Romans 3:23 says “For All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” Everyone agrees none of us are perfect, but some have a leaning toward different sins. Sin separates us from God, but the consequences of some sins are more extreme than others.

Either way, we can become snared in sin and be unable to free ourselves.

In 2 Peter, the apostle speaks of false teachers when he writes:  “They promise them freedom, but they themselves are slaves of corruption. For whatever overcomes a person, to that he is enslaved.” This verse makes it clear that a person can become a slave of sin.  Fortunately, the Apostle John shares you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

Bob Fife was enslaved by homosexuality for twenty years. His book, Out, tells his story of breaking free.

Learn more about Bob here.

2:10 Did the church reach out to you as you entered the lifestyle?

3:10 What was your family situation growing up?

4:38 What was your relationship like with your father?

6:20 I understand you were molested as a child.

9:00 A lot of people believe a homosexual cannot claim faith in Christ. Tell me how you did.

10:35 What keeps people in the lifestyle?

11:44 What was the catalyst that brought you out of perversion?

13:45 You said the homosexual community has conditional love. Can you explain that?

 

Bob Fife

Anger, Bible, Commitment to Christ, Communication, Divorce, Emotions, Family, Fellowship with believers, Fighting in Marriage, Forgiveness, Guilt, Heart of the Matter, Keeping our focus, Love, Making choices, Male Temperment, Marriage

Valentines Day Secrets: Love + Life Long Marriage

February 10, 2017

Valentines Day Secrets: Love + Life Long Marriage

Doesn’t everyone long for that perfect spouse that loves her forever? How can you achieve that?

There’s a huge interest in genealogical research today. People want to know their family tree, and they’ll go to great lengths to do that.  Because of the internet, more information of that kind is available. There are several online sites where you can find such information if you are willing to pay. Even in a sluggish economy, people opt in. Family is important, but broken relationships there can also be the more painful than any other. While friendships may not last, we often we don’t expect as much from our friends as we do family.

It’s interesting that while we long to know our family tree. Marrigaes are falling apart. The divorce rate is ridiciulous and many couples aren’t even getting married now. But let’s face it. From Genesis, Marriage forms the core of family. God preformed the first wedding ceremony. A man and a woman  had a child and that was the family.

We are nearing valentines day, and there’s talk of love. Because of this emotion, love,  people insist they must act as they feel. Red roses and chocolate candy can be found everywhere. Do those things constitute the kind of love that lasts? if not, then why?

Today I have Dianne Barker, and she has been married to the same man for fifty years. Presently she is writing a book about how to have a good marriage. She’s going to give us some tips.
2:00 Tell us the story of your marriage.

8:25 What were some of the differences you saw and how did you learn to accommodate?

11:47 Resolving Conflict

17:10 What if something he said hurt your feelings? What would you do?

21:45 How does your husband express love?

23:00 How did you come to understand how he expressed love?

26:10 Different temperament

Dianne Barker

Dianne Barker

 

Learn more about Dianne here.

 

 

Balance, Bible, Communication, Educating your children, Emotions, Encouragement, Family, Forgiveness, Goals, Heart of the Matter, Love, Parenting, Praise, Raising a daughter

Raising a Young Modern-Day Princess: Author Karen Whiting

December 16, 2016
Raising Young Modern Day Princess

Raising a Young Modern-Day Princess: Author Karen Whiting

How should a mother raise a ‘modern-day’ princess? That’s a good question. Being a woman today is more complicated than it should be. I don’t mind the women’s movement. After all, those early activists gave us the right to vote in 1920. However, a radical feminist movement has become part of our culture. Those women who lead the movement believe women live oppressed in a male-dominated world. Here are three of their stated goals. First, they want to take the masculine he/him out of our language, which has largely happened. Second, they want to refashion the role of women in society and the home. Third, they want to free women from childbearing through abortion and birth control.

As a result of this movement, many young women are confused about who and what they are. However, moms can have a significant impact on our children as we rear them according to Scripture. My guest today is Karen Whiting. She’s a best-selling author and mother of five. She has written the book, Raising a Young Modern-Day Princess.

2:10 What prompted you to write this book?

2:55 What are some ways a mother can teach her daughter to be a gracious lady?

4:10 How can you foster a teachable spirit?

5:00 It’s natural for mothers to find fault. How can we encourage toward excellence instead?

5:45 What are Mom tools?

7:40 Give us tips on how to get to know our child.

9:20 What if you have a melancholy child?

10:35 What should you do if one child has a birthday and another sibling, who is watching, becomes jealous?

11:35 Give us ways to infuse Scriptural principles into our girls?

15:00 What if your daughter refuses to talk?

15:59 Mothers do a lot. How can a busy mother find ways to climb into her daughter’s mind and personality?

17:25 Refusing extra jobs?

 

Modern day Princess

Karen Whiting

 

 

 

 

 

Learn more about Karen here.

Anger, Avoiding humdrum, Boundaries, Christmas holiday, Communication, Doing Family God's Way, Emotions, Family, Forgiveness, Guilt, Heart of the Matter, Love, Making choices, Parenting, People Pleaser, Responsiblity, Stress Reduction, Walking by Faith

Learn Ways to Handle Difficult Relatives that Make Christmas Miserable

December 9, 2016
Christmas

Get Along with Difficult Relatives at Christmas

Difficult relatives can make your Christmas miserable. Family can give us the most fulfillment when we actually connect with them, However, they can also cause the most heartache because we love them and long for their approval.  With the holidays coming, we all dread grumpy Uncle Bill or feisty Aunt Sally. Past hurts can also intensify the impact of uncomfortable encounters.

My father used to crack the same jokes every year and expect us to laugh. If I didn’t respond to his humor, he’d tease me about how my face looked, as if he thought I was holding in my response.

Mother would make a huge meal for Thanksgiving. I’d select certain foods, but not others, knowing I couldn’t eat it all. She would always point out what I missed, as if I overlooked that dish by accident. Plus she would attempt to get us all to eat more, even when we were full.

My grandmother would make snide comments with an innocent look on her face, and she’d do annoying things.  she favored boys over girls and she’d always make sure we knew how much she spent on the boys. If we asked her to do anything, she’d do the exact opposite.

Well, you know how it goes. Romans 12:18  says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.”  Wow! That’s a hefty command.

Today I have two guests. The first is Angela Breidenbach. She’s a life coach and a terribly fun person. The second is Linda Rondeau. Both can give insight on this issue.

 

Learn more about Angela here.

Author and Speaker

Angela Breidenbach

3:10 Give us suggestions Angela.

4:00 Open ended questions

5:00 What can you do if your relative is unlikely to succumb to your charms?

7:00 How can we engage the elderly relatives?

7:50 Start  with good memories.

11:50 Ask questions about their stories

20:30 Use mad libs

20:55 How might coloring books help?

32:26 How do  secrets play into a difficult relationship?

34:00 Talk about forgiveness.

Learn more about Linda here.

Linda Rondeau

 

Apologetics, Bible, Church, Commitment to Christ, Fellowship with believers, Forgiveness, Hope, Ministry using your gift, Philosophy, Standing for your faith, Understand our culture, Walking by Faith

When Anything Goes

October 7, 2016

When Anything Goes

When I was a little girl, I played with several chums in my neighborhood. If one of us did something inappropriate, the mothers talked and meted out punishment. In school, I recall hearing the Bible read. Everyone understood they should work hard in school and treat others with kindness. We shared a consensus on right and wrong.

Our country changed.

I saw billboards that said, “God is Dead.”

I recall a political campaign a number of years ago. The press kept saying character doesn’t matter.

Then there was: What is the meaning of the word ‘is’?

The new atheists today ridicule Christians. Believing in God is equivalent to believing in the Easter bunny.

I’m saddened when I see Christians portrayed with disdain and disgust on movies and the media.

Freedom of speech is not subject to Political correctness.

The Bible says, “Be ready to give an answer to anyone who asked the reason for the hope within you.”

Leslie Williams is my guest. She’s going to talk about living with wisdom and savvy in a crazy world anything goes. When Anything Goes is the name of her newest book.

1:55 What is post-Christian?

3:30 The difference between those who wear the label ‘Christian’ and those who are.

5:00 What is faith?

6:25 What is the god of the gaps?

9:05 How can we live as a Christian, and why is that still a good choice?

13:20 Are we addicted to meaning? What do you mean by that statement?

Learn more about Leslie’s book here.

anything-goes

Leslie Williams

Leslie Williams

Anger, Bible, Boundaries, Commitment to Christ, Communication, Doing Family God's Way, Educating your children, Emotions, Encouragement, Family, Fighting in Marriage, Forgiveness, Freedom, Home Atmosphere, Parenting, Respect, Rest, Trust

Fight with your Spouse and Grow Together

September 2, 2016
Fight or not to fight

Fight with your Spouse and Grow Together

Someone actually advocates fighting? Wow. You’ll love their answers.

“The wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable.” James 3:17

When you got married, you probably had stars in your eyes and romance in your heart. Many of us didn’t think much about the happily ever after part, but I grew up thinking peaceable meant hardly any conflict. Here’s a story about that.

We’ve all heard of the Victorian Age, and you probably have bad feelings about that time period. Well, Queen Victoria and her husband Albert were believers. That might surprise you, but they deliberately chose to set an example for the nation.

Victoria grew up in a home without a father. Her English father died when she was an infant, and her mother wasn’t particularly wise about getting along with people. Because her mother hoped to be regent when her daughter ascended the throne.

Victoria thought that no conflict was the goal in marriage. And she was queen. So when she married the man she loved, Prince Albert, she was in charge. And she gave him nothing to do. Plus the British constitution had no role for the prince consort. Well, it wasn’t long before Albert was quite frustrated.

The good news is that Albert was a strong believer, and he set a goal of ministering to his wife/family and the people of Britain. Their beginning was rocky. Victoria would get upset and scream. She was famed for her temper, but he was gentle and firm.

Not authentic, but it represents what actually went on. There’s a story told about Albert locking himself into a room. When she knocked he would ask who is there. If she said the queen. He wouldn’t allow her in. After a couple of years, he was able to convince her he had a better way. And together they built an incredible marriage which was the envy of Europe.

My guests today are Ron and Deb DeArmond. They wrote the book, Don’t Go to Bed Angry.

3:04 What gave rise to the book?

3:42 Leaving your baggage

4:35 Arguments in the DeArmond house

5:10 Their parameters

5:40 How to set parameters

6:40 Recovery from a heated discussion

8:20 Listening actively

9:00 Knowing how you process information is key

12:00 How to ‘table’ an intense discussion

Bible, Church, Commitment to Christ, Communication, Emotions, Forgiveness, Guilt, Heart of the Matter, Love, Making choices, Truth, Understand our culture, Walking by Faith, World

Stay in Touch with Our World

April 9, 2016
Understand our world

 

Stay in Touch with Our World

I once had a friend who came to Christ from a very secular lifestyle. The cute Bible covers prevalent at the time bothered her, and our lingo confused her. Those of us in the church have an entire vocabulary of Christianese, which can isolate us from unbelievers around us. For example, the word ‘saved’ has a particular meaning to us inside the church. Even the word ‘church’ has a unique definition because it refers to the people, not the building. Another example would be the ‘body of Christ.’ When we say that we are referring to believers as a whole particularly in view of spiritual gifts. A non-believer might think we are speaking of the physical body of Jesus. Even the various names we have for our Savior can be confusing. When I was a child, I assumed “Christ’ was his last name because I heard it combined with “Jesus’ so often.

Living in our Christian bubble feels comfortable, especially with the rapid changes around us. However, if we stay completely isolated, we won’t understand how others think. We won’t be able to share our hope with those who need Christ, and that is a huge part of our mission. In First Corinthians Paul said. “…I have become all things to all people that by all means I might save some.”

 

The Bible teaches we are all sinners, and even the things we consider good is like filthy rags before the Lord. That means that unsaved people might make choices we don’t expect, and respond in ways we can’t understand.

Terri Blackstock is today’s guest. She has just written, If I Run, which is a novel about a complex character who grew up without Christianity.  Her goal was to remind us how someone outside our faith might face a difficult situation. Listen and enjoy.

Learn more about Terry Blackstock here.

Author

Terri Blackstock

 

Authority of Scripture, Bible, Bondage breaker, Christmas, Church, Commitment to Christ, Communication, Crying out to God, Design, Doing Family God's Way, Educating your children, Emotions, Encouragement, Family, Forgiveness, Freedom, Guilt, Heart of the Matter, Hope, Love, Marriage, Parenting, Prayer, surrender, Truth, Walking by Faith

Be a Bondage Breaker

January 15, 2016
Broken Chains

Be a Bondage Breaker

Surely everyone would want to be released from bondage.  Right? You can be a bondage breaker.

There’s an interesting story told in the OT about that.

Theologians dubbed Jeremiah the weeping prophet. He had to deliver bad news and was often despondent. The spiritual failures of his nation tormented him because God had revealed his plan. Bondage. Jeremiah didn’t want his job, but the heartrending message burned inside him. He worked hard delivering God’s decrees, even employing creative imagery. His fellow citizens, however, preferred the soothing messages of the false prophets. Despite Jeremiah’s concern, his people plotted against him and threw him into prison. What a burden he carried.

Jeremiah had prophesied an upcoming invasion. And As he predicted, in 605 B.C. the Babylonians attacked and carried away the first captives. Daniel another prophet in the Old Testament was in that group. King Nebuchadnezzar deposed the King Jehoiachin who reigned in Jerusalem and placed Zedekiah, a man Nebuchadnezzar thought he could control.

Now, I don’t know about you, but after that incident, I like to think I would have listened to Jeremiah. He was correct. But most of the people continued living exactly the same way. Ignoring the alarm. After that event, Jeremiah predicted the fall of Jerusalem

I find it so interesting that King Zedekiah called Jeremiah to the palace and asked him what to do. Jeremiah told the king he would live if he gave himself up to the King of Babylon. The king refused and suffered the fated Jeremiah predicted.

I can relate to this story. I want our nation to turn back to God and avoid the judgment that will come. I want to be a bondage breaker.

Singer and song writer, Dennis Jernigan is my guest today. He’s written a book and completed a video series called, Stand in Love. It’s for churches and others who want to break their bondage.

Learn more about Dennis and his ministry here.

Writer and singer

Dennis Jernigan

Broken Chains

Bondage Breaker

 

Abuse, Betrayal, Bible, Boundaries, Church, Communication, Deceit, Educating your children, Emotions, Family, Forgiveness, Freedom, Heart of the Matter, Hope, Human trafficking, Love, Parenting, Prodigal child, Rape, Respect, Rights, Safety, Sex, Technology, Trust, Truth

Beware of Human Trafficking

October 16, 2015

Beware of Human Trafficking

How much is an individual worth? What about a woman? A child? The present administration has set up criteria to measure the worth of the individual to society. Obviously, the older you get, the more money your health care will take, which they dislike. They planned on having a board to decide who got health care and who didn’t. Elderly won’t receive care past a certain age. Based on the evolutionary standard, survival of the fittest, a person isn’t worth much. Evolutionists would view each of us as an accident of nature.

You determine worth by how much someone is willing to pay. Jesus gave his life to redeem us from sin. That makes each of us priceless.

Today we have the nightmare of human trafficking in which men entrap girls and women and enslave them for sexual pleasure. What a horror. As mothers and wives, we want our families protected and we long to see the captors freed.

Susan Coggins Norris speaks out for those in slavery, and she gives safety advice to keep us all free.

Learn more about her ministry here. Her personal page is here.

 

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