Great New Ways to Make Friends

October 19, 2018

We all enjoy spending time with friends, but personalities can get in the way when we don’t understand people. Let me explain.

You’ve heard about body life in church and people who feel like part of a church family. Sometimes that doesn’t happen, especially for women, and we ladies like to connect.

I’ve heard women say, “No one reaches out to me, or I don’t feel loved.”

You might hear someone day, “No one would miss me if I didn’t show up at church.”

Let’s consider some scriptures: Philippians two says, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.”

I like to call that living other-centered, thinking more about the other person. Worrying about the fact that no one calls you means you are thinking about yourself.

Romans says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” Meaning we do everything in our power to leave a good taste in someone’s mouth rather than burning bridges. The other person may or may not respond, but we have done what we could.

Based on these verses what are some ways we can make friends with people and have successful relationships? Linda Gilden has co-authored a book called Linked with Linda Goldfarb. The book discusses how personalities work to guide us in understanding ourselves and the other person. Linda Gilden is my guest today and she is going to talk about making and maintain friendships.


How to Listen so People Will Talk

October 12, 2018

Is it hard for you to listen? I have that problem.

Have you ever had a family member that never stopped talking? My dad was like that. (It may run in my family since I can do the same thing.)  One afternoon, he and my oldest son sat in the kitchen while I cleaned and dad rambled on for an hour. Every now and then I would look over at my son and admire his patience and compassion because Daddy never gave him a break anywhere in the monologue.

Finally, my son got up and announced he had to leave, and my father smiled and said he understood. After my son left the room, Daddy said, “Paul is such a good conversationalist.”

That made me realize Dad had no idea my son never interacted.

Mom and Dad used to entertain people and talk about themselves the entire night. And frankly, I have done that too. I love to talk, and I know I could do the same thing. I have to force my self to ask questions and take an interest in the other person. Because I can dominate.

That upsets me, because I want to be #othercentered instead of egotistical.

The Bible says be quick to hear and slow to speak. And in Philippians two, the Apostle Paul said to consider the other person as more important than yourself. Jesus lived that way, and that’s pretty radical.

I’ve discovered that works so much better than talking about yourself. People are flattered when you take an interest in them. So I bombard people with questions now.

Today Becky Harling is my guest, and she has just completed a book called How to Listen so People Will Talk. She’s going to share how we can learn to listen rather than talk nonstop.


You Can Have Freedom From Homosexuality

October 5, 2018

Is it possible to gain freedom from homosexuality? The answer is yes.

The homosexual movement has swept across our nation. In essence they have taken away our motto to hate the sin and love the sinner.

That’s very sad. Because God wants us to love the sinner and help them find freedom. And those in the lifestyle say you cannot be free.

Homosexuals are making inroads into church families. More and more young people are buying into the lie that you can choose your gender.  That’s a key word, Gender. That word would seem to indicate you have more choices that just male or female.

According to Genesis one, God created male and female and commissioned them to multiply and fill the earth.   That can only happen between a male and female: an XX and an XY.

We call that verse the Creation Mandate, and God has never revoked it. Every generation needs to produce the next or else the human race ends. (That fact became more evident when China enforced the one child policy. They’ve now revoked that because their boys have no girls to marry.)

Today a girl proclaims she is no longer XX but feels XY and so we call it choosing your gender even though there are only two sexes: XX and XY.  If we say that Bible calls that sin sets you up as a homophobe or one who hates. However, we are only repeating what God has said.

God calls Christians to love those in the world. Not hate!

It’s all very frustrating! But we still speak the truth. However, it’s very important to speak the truth in love.

MJ Nixon is my guest today. She found freedom from homosexuality and shares her story. Her group is Uprooted Heart. She has done a documentary with her fellow Ex LGBTQ.



October… We’re So Glad You’ve Arrived

October 2, 2018

SUPER excited to share this month’s Calendar Challenge. Why?

The 31st is Reformation Day, and the day the church remembered the saints from the past, hence All Saints Day… So, I decided to create a calendar challenge based on Hebrews; calling us to remember and imitate faith of those who came before us.


How to Survive After Being Abandoned

September 28, 2018

Years ago when my husband taught a Sunday school class to young couples, his cell phone rang just as he was about to start teaching one Sunday. He turned it off and continued.

I sat up front on his right, and I was dismayed when my phone began ringing. Running out of the room, I discovered my teenage son had just awakened and discovered the family was gone. At the time we usually drove several cars, and I didn’t worry who went in each car. And I didn’t I awaken my teens. They were old enough to do that.

When I sneaked back into the room, the entire classed turned toward me. I should have kept my mouth shut, but I blurted out, “That was our son. He just woke up.”

The whole class erupted in laughter. Their diligent teacher had abandoned one of his children.

That hurt our pride as we briefly discussed how on earth he could have missed us banging around the house getting ready for church, but no one was injured.

However, the story would be quite different if he had been a younger child. Women are nurturers and we want our nest in order. If a husband leaves, that’s unpleasant and unsettling.

I’m so glad Jesus said, I will never leave you or forsake you.

Today my guest is Edwina Cowgill who is telling the story of Alexandria Bagnell  Alexandria wrote Abandoned to the Heart of God based on her story. Her husband left when she had young children, and she explains how she survived.


Researching Your Family History

September 21, 2018

Recently I started researching my family history, and I discovered my great great grandmother’s name was Cynthia. I’m pretty sure my parents had no idea someone in our family tree had that name. Even thought I’m not named after her, I am thrilled to find another Cynthia in the family. In the past, I have found researching history a source of encouragement.

My youngest son is disabled, and I chose to homeschool him as I had my other four children.  while learning all about his needs and working to bring him up to his highest potential it was pretty easy to get discouraged.

I became interested in a historical figure and began researching. Because of his  impeccable character I really believed he was a Christian, and I was able to document his faith. How exciting to unearth something others had passed over.

His story provided the encouragement for that super tough time, and even launched me into writing because I believe if God encourages you, Like it says in 2 cor 2, we need to give that away to others.

I tell my story to rejoice in what God has done.

He wants us to do that.

When the Lord helped the Israelites cross the Jordan, he told them to pick up a large stone for every tribe to make a memorial.

Joshua 4:6 “Let this be a sign among you, so that when your children ask later, saying, ‘What do these stones mean to you?’

 (Jos. 4:6 NAS) Joshua 4:7 then you shall say to them, ‘Because the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the LORD; when it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off.’ So these stones shall become a memorial to the sons of Israel forever.”

Today I have Rebecca Price Janney. She has been researching her family and unearth a really fun story too. Even to the point that she feels a little like Cinderella. Her latest book is Easton at the Crossroads.


Darwin’s Mistake: The Origin of Sex

September 13, 2018

Darwin made mistakes.

Darwin goofed when he proclaimed the one-celled animal the simplest form of life. His microscopes couldn’t see the complexity we see today. The one celled animal is sofitsicated because one cell has to do all the work of our multi celled systems.

Most people don’t know Darwin assumed black people were lower in the evolutionary tree, and therefore less intelligent. That would upset a lot of people if they knew that.

When Darwin described his survival of the fittest based on the way animals adapted to his environment, He was describing a variation in a species, not the formation of a new species. That was something Gregory Mendel was describing about the same time.

Darwin’s work formed the basis for Hitler’s destruction of Jews in the Holocaust. Hitler based on Darwin’s work, deemed Jews less human, a lower form of life. That position is a pretty simple conclusion if you believe in survival of the fittest.

We don’t really want to live in a world where survival of the fittest rules. We would kill and obliterate the weakest among us. The outcome of that thought is tragic.

On the other hand, God proclaimed life was precious when he established the life for a life. And Jesus died to redeem us from the darkness and misery of sin. Redemption and restoration brings a hope to a damaged world.

F. La Gard Smith retired professor of law. He has written about Darwin’s mistakes too. “Darwin’s Secret Sex Problem. Exposing Evolution’s Fatal Flaw. The Origin of Sex.


Let’s Welcome September

September 1, 2018

Very excited to share this month’s Calendar Challenge. But, before we get there, let’s pray…
Dear Father, as the weather cools, remind me of your grace and unfailing love. Day to day life distracts me so keep me close by your side, reading Your Word, and praying for wisdom. Help me enjoy every moment and live in the joy of your presence. Thank you for my salvation.

In the name of Jesus we pray, Amen.

The Art of Living is #OthersCentered Calendar-September 2018-Cynthia L. Simmons
Click Here to Download the September “Others Centered” Calendar


Prayer: You Can Learn to Pray Like Jesus

August 31, 2018

“Pray without ceasing” I Thessalonians 5:17

Prayer used to be easy for me.  When I sensed God leaning over to listen. That was powerful, and I never wanted to stop. I’ve cried out in desperation and felt God’s presence. I treasure those moments.

However, life crushed some of my fondest dreams, and afterward  I found prayer more difficult. When I pray and feel silence or feel as if I’m in an underground tunnel, I want to quit. Give up.

I am now working again at prayer. So I’m very interested in the experiences of other.

Here’s what I’ve learned:

Satan does not want us to pray. He walks around like a roaring lion, and he would love to put barriers in our way.

Plus, walking by faith means we don’t see all that’s going on in the spiritual world. We don’t know what God might be doing that we can’t see.   I have to remind myself infusing my ow feelings into prayer has nothing to do with the reality of God’s mercy and love. A good prayer time doesn’t guarantee another one, or mean he listened more that time than when you feel like the sky is stone.

He loves me and listens even if I am tired or feel grumpy. The idea is to pray. Pray when it’s hard. Pray when you are discouraged. Pray when you are happy. Pray when you know life is changing, and you don’t like change. Pray. Pray.

This morning, I went to the printer to get copies of a curriculum I wrote for my latest novel. And I got home to discover the man assembled it wrong. Ugh! Rather than getting mad because I am busy, I made myself pray. And the tangled mess unwound.


Today Janet McHenry is my guest. She has written Complete Guide to the Prayers of Jesus. She will share what she has learned.


Needs: How to Get Your Needs Met

August 24, 2018

Who meets your needs?

As a young girl, I wanted a young handsome man to carry me off and look after me.  Sort of. I loved Cinderella and Snow White. Of course, a kiss from the prince would cure Snow White’s problem, forever.

And in real life, that’s not so far fetched, because men like to rescue their love.

This summer, my son married. At the reception, I ran errands for the brides family. At one point I had to take a message to the bride, and I forgot I had on a long fancy dress. I took off like I usually do and fell down a set of brick stairs. Ouch. My husband was very upset he didn’t see in time. He didn’t protect me. In truth, he didn’t know what I was doing.

He’s a wonderful man, and I adore him.

I wanted to fall in love with someone I could trust as well as love, and I did. However, I discovered he couldn’t meet all my needs. In fact, ten years ago, he came down with a severe illness that killed people before the days of antiviral drugs. He depended on me for four years while he recovered.

As a nurse, I used all that stuff I learned and I leaned on the Lord for wisdom in using it too.

Life taught me we cannot depend on others entirely. While friends share good times and hard, you can crush someone with your needs.

Katy Kauffman of Light House Bible studies has complied a book Heart Renovation, and she has a chapter on this topic. How can we get our needs met?

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